Take me out of the dark...

After all that has happened today, I started thinking of my OWN welfare again...

what if something you didn't expect happen?

Then something that you care about so much is taken away from you... and you have no choice but to succumb.

What if suddenly, you feel that you're not needed anymore? isn't that supposed to make leaving easier?

No, perhaps it's because you need assurance, that some person out there still needs you.

But why is it just about you? Other people have to grow also...

Why, when things are going so well, and I'm learning to let go, then something has to happen...

while I was thinking of all this, I started humming the chorus of a song I haven't heard for a while... it goes something like this:

Teach me to trust in You with all of my heart
To lean not on my own understanding
I just forget You won't give me what I can't bear
Take me out of the dark my Lord, I don't wanna be there...

which really spoke to me... a lot...

Maybe there's a bigger purpose to what's happening now... someday I will look back on it and see that I have made it through, hopefully a better man...

Lord, teach me to trust in you...